Christmas Happened.

I've been chomping at the bit to get our house in the Christmas spirit and yesterday it finally happened. Our plan was to get a tree, FINALLY (she says only ten days into December). Todd's folks dropped in to join us so first, we needed to load up on a delicious breakfast. Can I just say, pork chops and eggs are God's gift? Because damn they are so good. Even Alexandra got in on the fun when dada taught her how to gnaw on a pork chop bone.

Get it girl! You are so your mama's daughter! She really went to town on her food. She ate all of Todd's eggs plus one of the ones we got for her, two strips of bacon, one of Todd's sausages, and half a piece of toast. Oh, then she started clamoring for grandma's pork chop, and then Todd's, and then he was like, dude, just take this, and boom, that photo happened.

Anyways, we went to Home Depot and I am officially a fan of noble firs. Noble fir. That looks like the name of a font or something. But I digress. Noble firs! So beautiful, so regal, and not itchy and stabby like a douglas fir! Amazing. We found a super wet and springy tree that was so heavy and full of water that I could hardly pull it into an upright position, and took it home where we decorated the hell out of it while Alexandra pulled down the cookie ornaments and ate them.

BOOM goes the dynamite! Look at that thing! It's massive and gorgeous, just like me. I had gotten a box of 50 ornaments from Target, plus another little kit with smaller ornaments, and I am glad I did because this tree is so big, we wouldn't have had enough to go around (literally). Oh, and please direct your attention to that utterly badass and beautiful tree skirt THAT I MADE BY MYSELF.

You see how blurry that picture is? It's because I was trembling with excitement over finally getting to display the fruits of my labor from over two months ago. I literally jumped up and down up and down when we brought the tree inside because I was so goddamn excited about that tree skirt.

All that decorating took it out of us, so when the pizzas came, I made some pretty delicious, and pretty pretty, Christmas gimlets.

WHAT

THE

HELL

Yeah, that right there is a masterpiece, a holiday explosion of deliciousness and visual perfection. Ignore the shapeless twist, OKAY? I WAS EXCITED. AND HUNGRY. Focus instead on the jolly red sugar rim, the evergreen glow of the vodka concoction, and the base of red which miraculously didn't muddle up the green but instead settled beautifully on the bottom, like a cat in front of a fire. By the way, Bingley slept with us all last night and NEVER CATERWAULED. Mind blown? Yes. Yes it is.